Memories I want to leave behind

I had a really long drive home last night.  And I got to do it all by myself.  I got to rest in blessing-full music from Fernando Ortega, and just process my day.

What kind of memories do you hope you leave for your children?  I hope that I leave a home where they remember fondly when “mom used to say (insert profound thought here)”.  I hope they catch me praying on a regular basis, and know that I trusted God in the little things as well as the big.  I hope that they saw real love between their father and I, and realized that marriage is beautiful.   I hope they fully understood the meaning of grace; that I wrapped it around them and showed them God’s grace daily.

And last night, I thought about the mom-threats I used 15 minutes after they got out of bed.  You know the tone of voice you use when the bickering has started already today?  That wasn’t very grace-full.  Their father is gone away right now on Navy duty, and so it was just me.  I had no profound thoughts, except a desperate wondering “how many hours until school starts?”.

Then Fernando Ortega reminded me, in a quiet song, that “Whatever is true, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is excellent and worthy of praise, think on these things.”  I did help my children get ready for Farmer’s market last night, and I did tell each of them I loved them at least a few times yesterday.  I made them breakfast and lunch, and did their laundry for the umpteenth time this summer. 

There’s so much more I wanted to do.  We get so caught up in the busy-ness of “today” that we run over the needs of us, our children, our family.  I cram the gaps in my day with more than I thought I could even handle, and then wonder when I can just sit and rest.  Leaving some of those gaps should be intentional–that’s where the memories are designed to be left.

Father, please help me to mother for You today.  Help me to show them who You are in my words and actions.  Give me Your words at the right moments to teach them about Your love.  And, give me the patience to extend grace even when the house is littered with toys and colored pencils, the counter is covered with dirty dishes, and all they want is me.

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